Handprints

I thought about handprints all day today, it seems.  I decided this morning that Isaac is becoming too addicted to Elmo in the mornings, so we would fill our morning with other activities that are just as fun and more interactive.   

So we fingerpainted and made handprints with the paint...

Then after he woke up from his nap and it was time for a diaper change, he found something else in which you can make handprints...

But I also thought about God's handprint today.  To make a long story short, a little over a week ago Isaac started waking up from his nighttime sleep and daytime naps crying and calling out for mommy.  So after a couple of days, we made a doctor's appointment and found out that he had a viral infection and, to say the least, the past week has been very challenging.  Most of the time he has seemed fine -- his normal happy and healthy self -- other than being a little tired.  But other times he's been extremely fussy or clingy in a way he's never been before.  And quite frankly, what seem to be like the ups and downs of this virus are causing my emotions to follow the same pattern.

Since becoming a mom, I've noticed that I am continually dealing more and more with worry.  And while I know that all moms worry about their kids, there's a point where you can be consumed with worry.  And lately, I've gotten to that point.  Over the past week, I've analyzed every odd behavior, every cry, every moment of tiredness to the point that worry consumed my thoughts and I was constantly fearful that something more than a virus was affecting my child -- Is he scared of something?  Is he having night terrors?  Is he just really tired?  Is it just a temper tantrum?  Is he this or is he that?  Is this normal?

I realize that I don't know what the future brings, whether it be sickness or health, safety or harm, happiness or sorrow.  But I think on some level, I want control over those things.  And there comes a point where I have to decide if I'm going to trust God or I'm not.

I serve a God who is Sovereign...truly in control of all things.  And He gave his Son for me.  And here I am, worrying about the life of my own son, holding so tightly to him that I don't surrender him to the very One that created him.  We named our son Isaac after the Isaac in the Old Testament -- the son of promise, a miracle baby.  In many ways, Isaac was a son of promise to us.  So how ironic that I would deal with the same struggle of laying my Isaac down in sacrifice back to the God who calls me to give up everything to follow Christ.

So today after Isaac laid down for his nap, I had a time of weeping and admitting to God that I have dealt with worry and a lack of trust in Him.  And as I thought about this throughout the rest of today, I thought about how God has His handprint on his children.  For those who know Christ, we are sealed for the day of redemption (Ephesians 4:30), no one can snatch us out of his hand (John 10:28), and "He who began a good work in [us] will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ" (Philippians 1:6). 

And tonight I read a passage in Isaiah: "...we are the clay, and you are our potter, we are all the work of your hand." (Isaiah 64:8).  The footnote in my Bible states "Praying for the Power of God: Isaiah is moved to instruct God's people on how to pray for demonstration of God's saving power" (ESV Study Bible).  Isaiah talks about how we all "fade like a leaf" (vs. 6) and how God "acts for those who wait for him" (vs. 4).  I'm so encouraged to think about the mercy and patience that God shows us.  And realizing that I can't control the future for my kids, I'm glad that God is "for" me and helps me overcome the sin that separates me from the peace of knowing God, rather, is in control and loves me (and my children) more than I could ever imagine.  "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28). 

"What then shall we say to these things?  If God is for us, who can be against us?  He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?  Who shall bring any charge against God's elect?  It is God who justifies.  Who is to condemn?  Christ Jesus is the one who died--more than that, who was raised--who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?  Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?  As it is written, 'For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.'  No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.  For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."  (Romans 8:31-39)

Mom

Happy Mother's Day to my Mom!!!

I love my mom SO much!  I have the greatest mom in the world!  I am so thankful for her and her dedication as a mother.  She is the most amazing woman I know.  And my, oh my, what a pretty lady!

My mom has lived a life of sacrifice for her children and been the greatest example of unconditional love.  She's my biggest fan and has always supported me, even when I still had a lot to learn.  My mom has had her fair share of challenges in life, and she has always displayed a strength that I pray I will be able to show my own kids as they grow up.

I'm expecting a little girl near the end of August and it's exciting to think about the things I will share with her that are special to moms and their daughters.  My mom was there when I got my ears pierced.  She taught me how to shave my legs and how to wear makeup.  She cheered louder than anyone (literally) at my ball games.  We had mom/daughter movie nights and late night talks that sometimes meant only a few hours of sleep.  She helped me pick out my prom dresses and my wedding dress.  She smiled bigger than anyone during my happiest moments and she cried right along with me when I experienced heartache.  She was my greatest defender and uplifted me when the world made me feel small.  And all too often she let me shine while she took a backseat in recognition...all the while smiling with pride for her daughter.  She was faithful to pray for me.  I am so thankful for my mom!  Over the years my mom and I have grown to be the best of friends and I hope I'm half the mom that she's been.

  

Thank you, Mom, for being such a great mom.  Thank you for praying for me and for your encouragement and wisdom as I learn how to be a mom myself.  I love you with all my heart and I am so thankful for you!  Happy Mother's Day!!!

Thirty Years

Grow old along with me!

The best is yet to be,
The last of life, for which the first was made:
Our times are in His hand
Who saith "A whole I planned,
Youth shows but half; trust God: see all, nor be afraid!"

-Robert Browning (1812-1889)

Last Sunday, May 2nd, my parents celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary!  I am so incredibly thankful for my parents.  I honestly couldn't imagine having any better parents than these two!  They are continuously an example to me.  They are dedicated, hardworking people and have always been there for me, no matter the circumstance.  They have shown unconditional love and acceptance, even when parenting required discipline and "corrective instruction."  And they have shown my brother and I what commitment looks like.  They would be the first to tell you that the last 30 years have had joys and challenges alike.  But my brother and I have seen two people that love, forgive, and put their faith in God to continuously make all things new.  They have seen each other through cancer and job losses, health and job successes, triumphs and failures, joys and heartaches.  And now, thirty years later, are more in love than ever before. 

Last Friday night, on April 30th, my brother and I (along with our spouses) surprised my parents with an anniversary party.  My mom actually knew about it, but we somehow managed to completely surprise my dad who has been surprised a total of about twice in his entire life.  This is the guy who would go and "check" on my mom's stuff in lay-a-way at Wal-Mart until he heard that desired Christmas present listed off in the items on hold.  My husband and I were absolutely positive that he somehow knew something was in the works.  But 'lo and behold, we did it.  And because Matt, Isaac, and I live 7 hours away it was especially fun getting to surprise him with our visit.  It's been a couple of months since we've seen "Grandad" and it was such a blessing to see the joy on my dad's face that his grandson was there when he least expected it.

My brother made this video of my parents for the party...

I absolutely love seeing how my parents have transformed over the years.  It makes me think about how my own kids will giggle at the pictures that document the "styles" of the day that I, of course, know to be incredibly trendy.  

In honor of their wedding color, my sister-in-law Kassie and I decorated the party in white and baby/powder blue.  It would be classic if my mom still had her baby blue wedding dress and my dad still had his powder blue tuxedo!

My "adoptive parents" (lifelong family friends) helped in the surprise.  They offered to buy my parents dinner for their anniversary but had to make a "quick stop" by the church, where the party was held. 

 My parents with their cake.  Their actual wedding cake was white with blue accents.

Our family...Matt, me, Isaac, my parents, my brother Riley and his wife Kassie.

Congratulations, Mom and Dad!!!

I love and cherish you both tremendously!